Isn’t that scary word?
Yes. Without any doubt it is a scary word. But still don’t you reckon we use this word very often? We use term failure more than the term success. If anything we are going to start from scratch, the first thought always comes to our mind ” what if I fail in this ? ” . I am not arguing with your optimisation , I agree that we all think of success before starting anything but is that thought remained in our mind constantly ? If your answer is Yes , then tell me why we search most on the internet about success stories of that particular field we are going to work for? Just to mitigate the thought of failures. Right?
I have seen lot of strange searches on internet like
- What are the success stories of great leaders of industry?
- What can I do so that I cannot fail?
- Why I am here?
- What if I succeed.
I don’t say there is anything wrong in asking such a question , but my personal opinion is you don’t even need to seek your answer from other.
Just see the case here:
A person asks question on the forum , what are the pros and cons of particular thing say smartphone.?
Here in his mind he already finalized that he is gonna buy the thing for sure , still he wants to be sure so what he does? He asks the question to people , should he buy that phone or not?
- Here the real mind game starts. If majority people says good about that thing , he apparently becomes happy of his decision. But…
- If majority of people badmouth about it, then he starts thinking like, who are they to decide for me? Is company a fool to launch this product? I don’t need anyones advice.
So my boy, is this so? Why did you even ask question. Just for peace of your mind?
So my point here is the final decider is always your mind only.
Hence I am going to tell key points here to deal with failures.
Scenario: You have got failure.
First of all we should think what is the failure?
Most common definition of Failure is anything that not happen in your expected way.
See here, “your expected way ” . So all the thing brings down to mind only. That is the place where you create your failures and successes.
Psychology of Failure:
It’s not very complicated theory but ofcourse related with the mind so people thinks it as a complicated.
There are two types of Failure.
- Time independent failure (you can say it as a ultimate failure)
- Time dependent failure.
First kind of Failure is very rare I guess. People often mistaken the failure. Most of the failure are time dependent , vanishes their effect with time, these failures demands for improvement. But mind is very deceiving friend of us. It doesn’t want to work , it always wants things easy, so what it does this time? It goes blank.
Remember the situation come after failure . The constant thought in your mind “I don’t know what to do now?”
Tell me, is it even possible that we can’t think of anything. It is the deception of mind.
Always remember these golden words
“Whenever you think you are not able to decide what to do after failure, It is the time you should work for the improvements and achieve the success”
Why am I talking so? You should be thinking like what if it is real ultimate failure,? What if There is really no way out ?
These are obvious questions that our mind would generate to justify it’s action to not to think of anything. But trust me, if it is really a ultimate failure and your mind also reckon it as a same, by the trust of God, It will come to rescue you.
For example : if you are reading language unknown to you. Obviously you will fail to read it. That time you don’t struggle with those unknown symbols of that language. You simply leave it without any hesitation and go for your work. But when you read known language and don’t understand anything that time your mind think in following way. “Omg! I don’t get anything. Should I give a try on or leave it? Omg. I don’t know what to do now?“
This is the simple game of find. Understand it. You will come to know half of your problems are not even a actual problem. But still after encounter a failure what to do?
Dealing with failure:
You have decided that you got failure now what to do next?
- First of all try to figure out intensity of your failure. Recognise it’s type whether it is time independent or time dependent. To do all this. , You need to sit alone and chat with yourself about what has just happened to me.
- If you figure out it is time independent failure, you can’t do anything with it. But if you come up with the thought “what to do now” then you know which type of Failure is this.
- Calm yourself by anything you like. You can do meditation, play games, sleep. But right for now don’t discuss your failures with friends and family. You can discuss with them only when you are calm enough because the moment you get failed you filled with rage. So don’t make anyone not even you to be a victim of your rage.
- After you calm down, think for the possible ways for your success. Make a plan , talk with your loved ones.
- Prepare plan for next events. Most important thing is you have to be honest with yourself. Be responsible. Don’t blame others for failure.
Lastly always remember , it is you who decides your destiny . No one else in the world do it for you. Understanding the situation is most appropriate way to do. If you learn how your mind work on the problem , feelings , emotions you have to spend time with it. Think twice before you act.
Have a nice day!